Miss Royal Disaster

How to Split Up with Your Boyfriend

You may not be sure about any of your life perspectives but there’s is one thing that you definitely know. This guy will never date with you. He is dying from being impatient to receive your text message and you are dying from a single thought of going out with him. He may be good-looking and nice but extremely boring. Or funny, easy-going and generous but, well, not so good-looking. It’s up to you to decide which case is worse. Anyway now your goal is to red rid of him as quickly as possible.

  • The most effective way is to find someone else who will make your life complete. If you lack fun spend all your free time chatting with his fun-loving friend. If you don’t feel quite comfortable when being seen together go out with his elder brother. No one will have enough patience to bear such attitude.
  • Keep accusing him of not living up to your demands. Try to look for any examples of more successful men and compare them to your boyfriend. He must see what kind of man he is supposed to be. Each time demand more and more, and finally ask him to discover the levitation secret. I he will be surprised explain that you’ve always dreamt of dating a superhero.
  • Pretend to be his victim. Don’t give up complaining about being unable to live a full life or share your senses because you don’t want him to be upset because of you. Moan quietly and make him feel guilty. Follow him walking around the house with sad eyes permanently full of tears. Imagine yourself being a suffering princess locked up in a dark castle without a sign of sunshine. Gradually he will consider himself to be a real monster and decide to set you free by removing himself out of your sight forever.

  • Start giving him advice no matter if he asks for it or no. That tie doesn’t match his shoelaces. If he hears a strange sound while driving his car tell him that the spherical joints of angular velocities are probably worn out. Don’t take a pause and tell him about the best way to replace them. Pretend to be unpleasantly surprised when he will try to switch the conversation to another topic and proceed explaining the you want him to have everything the best.

  • Hide your emotions. Show as much affection as a stone does. He will appreciate your willpower and strong personality. In addition you may laugh at your boyfriend if he expresses any sign of a human feelings. Claim that a real man shouldn’t show any of them.
  • Tell him that you find his hobby ridiculous. If he collects vintage vinyls call him a nerd, if he enjoys any kind of sport give a remark that he pays little attention to his intellect development. That will do enough for him to lose his grip and finally find a better girlfriend.
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